Healing Forward
How addressing trauma led me from isolation to impactful action.
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Incredible things happen when you begin to address the roots of your trauma…
Such as speaking with your Senator’s office about a bill you’re advocating for.
On Tuesday, March 25th, I participated in the Texas Humane Legislative Network’s annual Humane Lobby Day. Given the C-PTSD that I’ve been navigating since June 2022, when our journey with Leia began, this was a huge step forward in my healing.
If you’re not familiar with Leia’s journey, TAP HERE.
Being in a room with 200 people I didn’t know was enough to activate my nervous system, but lobbying with politicians took this to a new level.
Before 2022, this would have been outside of my comfort zone. Add to that the fact that these days have me oscillating in and out of extreme states of anxiety and hyper-vigilance, and this felt like mission impossible.
Yes, I was once confident–someone who could quickly speak on stages to hundreds of people without a written speech. I used to host live events and a podcast, and I’ve been interviewed on hundreds of other podcasts. But what I’ve come to realize is that my former sense of confidence was rooted in trauma–it was a survival mechanism I activated to keep myself safe.
My traumatic experience with Leia in 2022 and the seemingly endless stream of traumatic events that followed left me completely bare, with zero identities to hide behind.
My once unshakable confidence was replaced with a raw vulnerability that left me isolated in my home for months, from catatonic states to living in fear due to the harassment, online stalking, and attacks that I was faced with, and being sued (yes, sued) by the very people responsible for the loss of Leia.
All of this pierced the deepest parts of my core wound…
Not feeling seen, heard, or acknowledged, and being attacked, gaslit, and abandoned.
My core trauma resurfaced like a horriffic nightmare that wouldn’t end, leaving me feeling crippled and frozen in pain.
The day that we lost Leia, my fight response became activated because my nervous system knew that I needed that fight to get through what I was going through… but at some point, that fight burnt out, leaving me with nothing but a pile of ashes that was once my life.
What most people don’t understand about our trauma responses is that we are not meant to live in them—we are meant to oscillate in and out of them with resilience, moving from activated to grounded states with ease.
When we are in a fight-or-flight response for too long, the nervous system naturally tires out, shifting us into freeze or catatonic states. This is what happened to me… my body had had enough.
I have been devoted to healing this core trauma ever since, knowing that if I don’t heal this now, I will continue to experience it in my life.
So I’ve been healing…
Acknowledging the challenging parts of my life that I’ve never yet acknowledged…
Seeing my shadows and taking deeper responsibility for my growth…
Recognizing the parts of me that never received the love that they deserved.
And ooof… It’s been the most profound journey of my life.
Yet this journey led me to the event at the Capitol, where I did something I truly believed I couldn’t do. I advocated and lobbied for a bill I’ve been supporting since losing Leia, which I did in a big way.
HB 285 (aka “Pancho’s Law”) adds criminal negligence to the current animal cruelty law, which would hold dog service businesses accountable for negligence.
Under current Texas law, pet service businesses face no legal accountability for negligence—even in cases where they knowingly or intentionally harm or cause the death of an animal. A business can avoid liability simply by stating, "I didn't mean to."
This legal gap leaves pet owners without meaningful recourse and pets without adequate protection.
Adding the phrase “or with criminal negligence” to the existing animal cruelty statute will ensure greater accountability from pet service businesses, protecting Texas consumers and their beloved pets.
By updating this law, Texas families will gain a clear course of action in cases of negligence or harm. As pet service businesses become aware of this increased accountability, they will be encouraged to operate with greater responsibility, ultimately protecting pets and their owners statewide.
What inspired HB 285?
In 2021, Maria and Paul Mecca’s dog, Pancho, was killed while under the care of a Dallas dog daycare. The business avoided accountability by simply stating, “We didn’t mean to kill your dog.” Under current Texas law, this negligence claim alone is sufficient for pet service businesses to evade responsibility and legal repercussions.
Since their loss, Maria and Paul Mecca have connected with hundreds of Texans whose dogs have similarly lost their lives due to negligence at pet service providers, including groomers, daycares, boarding facilities, and trainers.
I am one of these dog owners. I've advocated for this bill since 2022, when we lost our beloved doodle, Leia, at a local dog daycare. Unfortunately, I cannot share more details because the business sued us for defamation after our attempts to uncover the truth, and our legal journey is ongoing.
I could share hundreds more stories, but instead, I’d like to highlight a critical fact:
Under current Texas law, pet service businesses cannot be held accountable when pets in their care are injured or killed due to negligence.
HB 285—also known as Pancho’s Law—would address this issue through a simple but impactful amendment to the existing Animal Cruelty Law.
This would have changed everything in our case and hundreds of others.
On March 25th, 2025, I activated a more profound state of confidence–one that was rooted in my healing, not my trauma. With Leia watching over me, I had conversations with our Senator and State Representative’s offices, which ended with one of them saying, “I don’t see why we wouldn’t pass this bill.”
It was a hugely successful day for HB 285.
But it was also a resounding validation of the healing work I’ve been doing, which has filled me with pride in my devotion to my journey.
#PotentTruth:
You can use trauma
to fuel your strength,
but at some point,
your strength will become
too heavy a burden.
True inner strength
is driven by your healing.
Incredible things happen when you address the roots of your trauma. As challenging as the trauma healing journey is, it’s a journey that will have you meeting the most genuine parts of yourself.
Choose to heal forward and lead your life by your healing, not your trauma, and I promise that you will surprise yourself with what becomes possible.
With Gratitude,
Why Subscribe?
This is a trauma-informed space where I explore complex trauma, integrated healing, personal growth, and embodied leadership with curiosity and humanity. Here, I don’t offer quick fixes—I dive deep into the layers of healing and transformation, unpacking the nuances of leadership and growth through a lens that honors both the nervous system and the soul. If you're seeking grounded insights, real conversations, and a more integrated path forward, you’re in the right place. Subscribers will receive newly written articles directly in their inbox.
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In a digital world overburdened with information, I am deeply humbled that you chose to view my content.
So true Ruby, ALL of it. 🤍🤍🤍